In my column last week I talked about the importance of spending time alone to get to know yourself, to connect with yourself and ultimately develop a relationship with yourself. Over the last few years I took a lot of time to do just that. That time allowed me to love and appreciate my own company and cultivate my own happiness. After having done that, I felt I was ready to invite someone else to join me in my journey. It was only when I learnt to stand alone in in my own power that I was ready to stand together with another person, and that’s why I have decided to share my life with someone.
Here is what I have learnt over the last few months; the more intimately you get to know another person, the more clearly you see each other’s flaws. That’s just the way it is. That’s why friendships don’t last and relationships fail. People think they love another person until they see the way they act when they are under a huge amount of pressure, all out of money or when their back is against the wall. I believe love is something different, love is choosing to serve someone and stay with them in-spite of themselves. Love is patient, love is kind, love is deliberate, love is asking if you have eaten, love is asking how you are feeling today, love is ‘be careful’, love is ‘I’m praying for you’, love is ‘you can do it’, love is respect and love is limitless. Love is also hard and it’s also sacrifice. Love is seeing the darkness in each other and refusing to jump ship. Never wait for an ‘I love you’ to believe you are loved. I wish you a life full of love.
*The author is a consultant and coach. Instagram handle: @miss_shefa, Website: missshefa.com
Shefa Ali
